Everyone is losing their sh!t over Batman’s penis.

4A01F7CE-72EE-469F-B54D-FF7F893A094A The heft of his ample member weighs heavily on the Dark Knight’s  brooding soul.

Comics, like movies and games, is an ever evolving form of entertainment. As society changes, what is and isn’t considered acceptable changes with it. Sometimes, it seems, people feel things go too far. This isn’t the first time Comics has pushed the envelope, however.

Do you remember in the ‘60s when those amateurs Lee and O’Neil brought drugs into Spider-Man and Green Lantern comics? 

Disgraceful.

And then in the mid ‘80s when Squadron Supreme, Watchmen, and the Dark Knight Returns made politics even more predominate in comics than they already were? Those books even introduced mature themes—and one even showed a blue penis—repeatedly. They were written by some hacks named Gruenwald, Moore, and Miller. 

0B7E3FDA-E236-41E7-A3F2-D3CE986C40D0SJW vs. Far Right shenanigans.

Miller’s book was just the start of the end for Batman. What about that Arkham Asylum graphic novel that came out in 1989, wherein Clayface explains his tortured life by proclaiming he was not born, but instead was “shit into existence?“

1B4A9652-A524-4F62-81E1-832F10CD75C6 Oh, the humanity.

That one was written by some nobody named Morrison who I’m sure never went anywhere. Remember how that mature readers’ book ruined Batman, forever?

Oh, wait.

In this age, everyone has to be outraged about what is being done to their beloved characters (“Not MY Luke Skywalker,” anyone?) Social media helps facilitate this because everyone feels powerful while hiding behind their computer or phone screen. There are no obvious consequences (although that seems to be changing).

Comic and film franchises can and should try new things without violating the old ones. A mature line doesn’t detract from the regular one, and vise versa.

Here’s how it works—you don’t like it, don’t buy it. 

—Andrew E.C. Gaska

P.S.

…and now, the batarang:

6B3CD29E-EFBC-4B5F-A956-E31D53461550Peniacal.

UPDATE: Due to public outcry, DC has neutered the Batman. All reprints will no longer showcase his penis—it has been been erased from existence.

Good job, heroes. I hope you’re happy.

 

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